December 11th, 2019 | Blog
at some point in december 2009 i was probably digging my car out of the rutgers livingston parking lot so that i could drive home to work 1-3 gigs at a party rental place i worked for. bounce houses, cotton candy, dunk tanks, chocolate fountains, all that shit. i hated it but it paid pretty well. i liked the other people i worked jobs with; we spent a lot of time on the road. we were hired for colleges and high schools and companies all around the tri-state area, so sometimes it'd be like a 4 or 5 hour commute to wherever the gig was that day. eating gross food at gas stations, late night coffee runs, becoming slightly delirious from being awake for 20 hours and driving on the highway in the pitch-black. it was fun in a horrible kind of way. depression does that to ya; makes you enjoy stuff that anyone else would find fucking awful simply because your own brain is so horrible to itself all the time, any break in that feels great.
a lot changed in the ten years from then to now, and i'm grateful that things never got too dark on me that i gave up.